I've got something on my mind. Boobs! More specifically, nipples. Even more specifically, nipple placement.
Have you seen the movie Babies yet? There are some free-range boobies in that movie! But that's not what this post is about. But if you want to see crawling naked dusty babies reaching for very weathered war-torn nips, than go see it. Really, the movie was very cute, I'm just being crass.
So, I'm pushing 30, and I have large knockers. I'm a D cup, so I know about the trials and tribulations that come with being well endowed. I also know that gravity is not so kind to my kind. I mean, my boobs aren't like Ms Chokesondick from South Park, but they're not 18 yr old boobs either. This is to say, that I no longer have the coveted up-turned boobs anymore...and I'm ok with that. I think. What I'm not okay with is this.
Women who put their boobs into their bras and do no adjustment whatsoever. I may be the only one in this camp, but I'm willing to put myself out there. Here's the deal. When you put your bra on, you adjust your boobs a smidge right? When I put on bras, especially sports bras, I make sure my nipples line up. I don't want one rogue nip in the south-40 and the other one all sitting perky, cause if it's cold, it's so so wrong.
I liken this to looking at a cross eyed person, or someone with a wandering eye, bless their hearts, but it's awkward. Which boob do I focus on ya' know?
So please, for humanity, next time you put on a bra adjust your boobs so both eyes are looking straight forward, m-kay?