I don't care what you say, I fully expect my life to be better when I'm thinner. If I didn't, then WHY would I be trying to lose weight?
I've had mixed emotions about goal setting for a long time now. Well, goal setting in regards to weight loss. I can't tell you how many times I've told myself that I wanted to be "X" size or "Y" weight by a certain time frame or event.
Scott and I are spending Christmas in Chicago this year. I'm beyond excited. I love Chicago more than any other city and I think Christmas in Chicago is so romantic in a 1940's, men wearing hats (not the band), women dressing in fur and red lipstick, sort of way. I plan on doing a lot of kissing, Manhattan drinking, fire gazing, Christmas light watching and just overall nuzzling. Can I do this at the weight that I am? Yep. Do I want to? Nope. It's like somehow I feel like my experience will be diminished in some way if I'm fat.
I don't believe the lie that life will somehow be magically delicious if I'm thin, but in a lot of ways I think it will be better. I know, I know...I'm not supposed to say that, but I think it's true. Because, truth is, life IS easier in many ways for thin people. Take shopping for instance. This weekend we were dreaming up things to do while we're in Chi-town and I was all, we should wear hats! And Scott was like, ok. Then I was like, I want one with one of those net things in front, and he was like, a veil? Then he suggested going to a haberdashery in Chicago. Do you all think hats are as awesome as I do? Something old timey about them... makes me want to do old timey things.
So one day when we're in Chicago we're going to buy Scott a new suit, me a fancy dress and go to a haberdashery and get hats...a net one for me please, Ahem, a "veil" excuse me. Then maybe go see a play.
But here's where the potential problem lies. It's not super easy for girls "just my size" to find fancy dresses on a whim. I'm a 16 on a good day, 18 on a regular day. Where am I going to shop? Old freekin' Navy? I don't think so. I'm not expecting to go into any store and be able to fit into everything, but I also don't want to be limited to the Plus size section of Macy's or Old Navy. Nothing says disappointment like traveling to Chicago, walking down Michigan Ave and buying clothes at Old Navy or worse...Target. Sort of like eating at Chili's on vacation when you have a million new restaurants to try.
So my "goal" is to be in a normal size by Christmas. I'm thinking 14 is as realistic as it's going to get for that time frame. I'll even settle for 14 on a good day, 16 on a regular day, although the smaller I am, the easier it will be for me to shop. I'm so motivated by shopping and clothes. Some people are motivated by climbing mountains and running marathons, I'm motivated by designer jeans. Shallow? Maybe. But I'm not a shallow person, I just prefer to dress like one.
What motivates you? Do you think that goal setting is healthy, or do you think that in a way we're setting ourselves up for disappointment?
My health motivates me but not carrying around 3 spare tires really motivates me. I hate buying shirts especially at Old Navy and only seeing chunk roll after chuck roll right through it. When they disappear the I'll be one happy camper!
ReplyDeleteGoal setting is healthy. I don't think that timestamping goals is a great idea though. Saying, I want to lose this much by this date... or be this size by this date.. We don't have complete control over either of those things (and with the added pressure of the looming date, it makes it harder).
ReplyDeleteWe don't get to choose where we lose weight, or how fast it comes off (within reason).
Where it ends up being a not so great idea (in my opinion) is when people don't see their accomplishments because they didn't reach their timestamped goal. For example... I once set a goal to lose 30 pounds by an event. I worked really hard and lost 22 pounds. Not 30 and I beat myself up about it. Well, I lost more than 2/3 of what I wanted to lose but that was lost on me.
I guess what it boils down to, is are you going to be able to see the forest through the trees? If you get into a size 16 dress, are you going to beat yourself up because you didn't get to the 14? If not, go for it.
Either way, you'll find a stunning dress and have a marvelous time! I'm positive of it!
I do set goals but i don't set time frames for them very often. I mean, i may have weekly or monthly goals but not ones that state "i will lose X amount of weight by this date." I just do the ones that say "i will exercise 4 days this week." But i agree w/ you that life will be better when we're thinner. Why? B/c life is excellent right now! But the ONLY thing that SUCKS about it is my weight! There truly are things that will be better when i'm thinner. Shopping for instance, of course.
ReplyDeleteThough i found an awesome dress by Donna Ricco. I don't know if she sells her clothes in stores b/c i ordered mine online. I'm in a 22. And i feel SEXY in it! :)
Mmmm...magically delicious!!! :)
ReplyDeleteI think goal setting is great and I think that if you want to lose 30 pounds by Christmas you CAN do it. Just don't get upset with yourself if you don't fit into what you want to fit into...your hard work is still fabulous.
Also? You are so cute with your old timey references :)
Great post!!! If you dont strive for a goal you will never reach it because you havent set it, if you set it and you dont quite reach it at least you know you tried AND your closer than you were before you set it!
ReplyDeleteps. I LOVE hats!!! :o)
good thoughts. smile.
ReplyDeleteGoal setting is great. I set a goal January 1, 2010 that I would lose 60 pounds by September. I am 15 pounds away. May not make it, but I would not be this far if I had not tried. I will be setting a new goal in September!!
ReplyDeleteSetting goals is part of individual growth and time stamping these goals make us focus on what we want to achieve. The keyword is "focus". Sis, hunker down and achieve your goal. Size 14 is more doable than you realize. This is a realistic goal. You're not setting an unhealthy goal of 100 lb weightloss in 2 weeks or you want to get down to a size 2. You want to drop two dress sizes. You can do it.
ReplyDeleteYes, being a smaller size (going down two dress sizes to a size 14, not saying you have to be waif-thin) will bring some convenience to your life, all the way around. Love you. Keep it goin'. :)
fyi, i like my friends shallow.
ReplyDeleteyou're doing amazing. goals are great as long as you incorporate a bit of wiggle room. goal sounds better than deadline. goals are fun and positive, like one of those paper ring chains that countdown to summer vacation. deadlines are hardcore like alarm clocks and everyone hates alarm clocks.